#@$%&!

I hate people.
I know I shouldn't even think such things, let alone write them in a blog for all the world to see (LOL, as if), especially during Lent, and most especially during Holy Week.
But, I have to vent somehow. Or quit driving. Since the latter is not really feasible at this time, voila.
As I drive, I sometimes think of bumper stickers I'd like to put on my car- when I'm not worrying about what will happen if I have to make a sudden stop, which will cause the idiot on my bumper to rear-end me (which it seems he wouldn't mind doing, since he's so close). Today it was, "I have the right (and obligation) to do the speed limit, but you have no right to tailgate me." (It sounded a lot better with all the cusswords.) Another one was, "If I'm not going fast enough for you, I can always SLOW DOWN!" I actually made one once that said. "Tailgating is not merely stupid- it's also illegal." It was surprisingly effective.
Another one that might come in handy around here is, "Use your turn signal- it's not just a courtesy: it's the law" but I think the people who most need to be reminded of that probably can't read, anyway. They probably don't have their licenses, either, so that's the least of my worries when sharing the road with them.
Today I also encountered one of the biggest kinds of idiots I've been tormented by: ones who tailgate you when you're speeding.
In my defense, let me say that I only speed on that particular street because if I don't, I will regularly be tailgated and occasionally passed by people who have crap for brains. It is a winding road, so it's extremely dangerous to try to pass on it- which is why the whole thing is marked "No Passing." Some of the idiots who use it appear to be under the impression that it is wide enough for two cars in one direction. It is not- that is why there is no dotted white line dividing it into 2 lanes. To drive around someone, even (or especially) next to the curb, is an invitation to disaster, since the road winds along the top of a cliff and has many side streets intersecting it.
Today as I drove on that street after dropping off the kids at school, I had one of those drivers on my tail who appeared to expect me to squeeze over next to the curb so he could pass me (again, this is in a No Passing zone). Since I was doing 39 in a 35 zone, that really made me mad, so I hit the brakes instead. I came to a complete stop, right there in the street. (Coincidentally, there was a squirrel at the side of the road, and it looked like it was going to run out in front of me.) The idiot sat behind me and honked his horn before figuring out that he could now pass me (without danger of killing someone). I know I should be ashamed that I flipped this person off as they went around me, but I'm not.
I used to not have so many problems driving around here. Then I got 3 tickets in a year and had to go to traffic court. Traffic court in Cleveland is a dress rehearsal for Purgatory, and I vowed that I would never end up there again. So far, so good. But it was extremely hard to force myself to obey the speed limits.
Then I got sick of people harrassing and intimidating me for going too slow (aka doing the speed limit), so I started doing 4 miles per hour over. That eliminates most of the tailgaters, but occasionally I'll get one of those freaking losers who always tailgates everyone. It's like they never heard of keeping a safe distance when following another vehicle. Which is why I'm pretty sure they don't have licenses. And it's undoubtedly the explanation for why their vehicles so often are damaged. What really scares me, though, are the ones who are driving around with a windshield that was broken by somebody's head. You just know it was the person who's now riding your bumper.
Well, I feel a little better. Thanks for listening.