Not Cool

As I was driving the kids to school this morning, we passed by a young man who was walking a couple of dogs on the sidewalk. He was wearing a baseball cap and a sports jacket, and looked perfectly normal- at first glance. Then I noticed he was moving his mouth as if talking, and gesticulating with his free hand. He didn't appear to be addressing the dogs, so 3 possible explanations flashed through my mind:
1. He's schizophrenic and talking to the voices only he can hear
2. He's rehearsing a speech
3. He's using a hands-free phone
Since we were in one of the area's ritzier neighborhoods, I figured it must be Option 3. But I had to laugh: I wonder if people who shell out good money for such modern conveniences and status symbols realize that, for many of us, when we see them attempting to show off their expensive toys, the first thing we think of is not, "Gee, how cool! I want/wish I could afford one of those!"
Sorry, but I suspect when most of us see someone apparently talking to himself, our first thought is more like, "What the... is he talking to himself?!" and we are automatically aroused to caution, not admiration or envy.
I have encountered these pseudo schizos in stores a few times already. I don't think I'm ever going to get used to people who not only cannot bring themselves to acknowledge the presence of others with a smile or an "Excuse me," where appropriate, or even by just making eye contact, but now impose upon others in the following manner:
You're in a store, minding your own business. There's another person nearby, and suddenly this person says something. Normally, it would be safe to assume the person is talking to you, since you're the only other person around, they're not holding a cell phone, and they aren't speaking loudly enough to be heard by someone in the next aisle. But what they said doesn't make any dang sense. You have a fleeting thought that people who talk to themselves like that can be dangerous, but you try not to freak out. While you're trying to figure out whether or how to respond, the person says something else, which also doesn't make sense, and eventually you realize they must be talking on one of those darn hands-free phones. Doh! And some of them have the nerve to look at us as if WE'RE crazy.
It's worse when what they say DOES make sense, though. If a person says hello to me, I am the kind of person who will say hello back. If you fall for that with one of these people, somehow you're left feeling like an idiot. That is not right. It's even more embarassing than- and not nearly as funny as- when you're in a store and you hear a kid call out, "Mom" and you and every other mother within earshot either answers or has to stop and ask herself, "Did I bring any of the kids with me?"
Well, one good thing to come of this isolating and alienating technology is, schizophrenics are probably not as noticeable as they once were.
At least, I THINK that's a good thing...